Dear _____,
I wish you could know the feeling I put into these words, the pain that I've felt over this period of time. That I understand the torment welled up inside you like a knife tearing at your heart and soul. I wish I could have given a better explanation as to why I made the decision I did, but we needed a clean cut if this was going to be less painful than it could have been. Never mind you'll find someone like me, probably better, I wish nothing but the best for you. I ask that you forget me, and that your greatest dreams come true; I in turn have hidden your memory deep within my heart. I promised that I couldn't forget you even if I wanted to, remember?
I can't even listen to our song anymore because the aching starts
again and I wish it wasn't like that. My explanation to making the
decision was that my family comes first. And I couldn't have a
sisterhood with someone who will be against my family, that's not what
family is. I've hurt my family by doing that once before, and I've
regretted it ever since. You might see your side of the story as right,
and I see my decision a responsible one because of that. You have no
idea how much it was eating away at me inside because of it, I was
falling deeper into a depression and I couldn't do that over again. I was
crying every night thinking of you. I cried because I had to end it
over this, and I knew I would cause you so much pain. What your family
thinks of it does not matter in the slightest bit, because it was
between you and I.
I only wish you could know the full story, but that's something you have to decipher on your own. A sisterhood is something that leaves everlasting imprints, some good, some that scar. When I think back on our sisterhood I only want to remember the good memories; the times we laughed, the times we smiled, the times we cried because we were so happy. I want to be able to think of you and not have tears swell up in my eyes or an ache in my heart that won't go away. I promised to always be there for you, and even though I can't be there physically I will not stop praying for you. I think about you more than once a day, and it pains me to. I don't want your memory to bring pain. And I wish my memory would not bring pain to you, but I know it does. And I know it feels like it's unbearable to hold that in your heart but time forgets...
So, even if it hurts, pretend that it's nothing. Even if tears fall, know how to hide them. Placing it on one side of the heart, and knowing how to smile as if nothing is wrong. My heart is growing dim again and many lingering attachments are pulling down. It will probably be erased, it will become faint. Even if I say I miss you, I can't ever see you. Even if it hurts, I have to withstand it. Only my welled up tears remember you, and there are so many traces of happiness. To me, love is such a painful thing.
Sometimes, I will think of you
Only good memories will exist...
Still Forever Loved By,
Your Broken Sister
